Photo Ops

Well folks, with our days filled to the brim with giggles and wiggles, play dough and poopy diapers, there is only so much time to squeeze in a little blog time.  Here are a few more pictures of the last several months around here, though not in chronological order. I am loving being a Mommy of two amazing kiddos.  Ezra is beginning to show us more and more personality, and Phoebe...well, you all know she's got plenty of that!  We are enjoying our time as a family and loving life in beautiful Hawaii.  We are incredibly blessed!

Sissy Love

Ezra's napped almost exclusively in the baby carrier for his first several months....eating was a bit tricky!

Ah, teething...

Nice day for a dip

His first rash guard

Looking so fancy in a crown...

The Bumbo didn't last long with this guy, who definitely lives up to the title, "Bouncing Baby Boy"! You should see me try to wrestle him into his pajamas every night!!

Look familiar?  This boy would suck one, two, or even three fingers at a time until
recently settling on his thumb.  Another self-soother in the family!

Thanks for the "Baby Legs" Melynne!

His first ride on the back!

Look at me sitting up all by myself!

This girl has an eye for fashion...

Hey, they can ride together in the Costco cart!

Another fancy accessory for the boy!

Just hangin'

He used to carry Phoebe like this too!

Phoebe likes to hike with Daddy.  This is the view from Diamond Head. She does this one on her own...mostly!

Having a "moment" on one of
their many adventures together.

Sunrise view from one of Xee's early morning hikes...gorgeous!

This Journey

I don't quite know when it happened.  When did she get so tall?  Has her face changed yet again?  Did I not just pull her out of a baby pouch and stand her on chubby, wobbly legs to roam freely in the grass?  I sit here alone in the living room and glance at the clean laundry sprawled out all over our sofa, but I cannot let this moment pass me by, for I fear that it may forever be lost if I do not write.  I must write.

Tonight I looked at your big, brown eyes staring up at me.  I stroked your wet hair as your naked form stood next to mine in the shower. You nestled your head against my ribcage while I rinsed away shampoo suds.  No longer a babe in my arms, but a little lady.  A baby still, yet no longer.  I take a deep breath.

We step out onto the mat and I look at your feet.  They've grown.  They are shaped just like mine.  You brush your teeth and I glance up at the mirror.  Who is this woman looking back at me?  I see myself, yet someone else as well.  A familiar face from my youth.  A mother.

You brush and floss your own teeth, and I begin to brush your hair.  You reach for the brush and say, "I'll do it."  I follow you into your room. You get into your pajamas, then you offer to read me a bedtime story for a change.  "Okay," I say.  We snuggle up close and I listen as you read me one of your favorite books.  I hear your tale, but in my mind's eye, I'm taken to another place...a vision of our journey together thus far.

I glance down at my swollen belly, then at the dirt road under foot.  Starting at the base of the hill, I cannot see the road ahead.  I begin the walk.

Soon I am swaddling a babe in my arms.  I keep walking.  The road is windy as we begin to climb higher and higher still.  We round the corner.  Now you are on my back.

Another turn up ahead.  I lean over as you grasp my fingers for support while your little legs scoot along.

I look to my left, and now you are reaching up to take hold of just one hand.  We walk like this for a long time, hand-in-hand, along the steady incline.  Sometimes I carry you.

We skip. We run.  We laugh.

You pout.  I shout.  We laugh.  We cry.

We walk.

We run.

We stop.

Another blind corner.

Slowly we approach.  Then we gasp.  It's beautiful.

We are at the edge of the precipice, overlooking the beautiful valley.

The edge of innocence.

Now the tough questions begin.

"Mommy, why doesn't her daddy live with her and her mommy?"

"Do some people not go to heaven?"  "Where do they go instead?"

"How do they make donuts anyway?"  Giggle

We stand like this for a bit longer, side by side.

We both look down.

It's a long way down.

A gust of wind forces a step back.

You reach up and clench my hand once more.

Both fear and excitement burn like fire in your eyes.

Shall we explore?  Or will we gaze out for just a bit longer, my Love?

Stay close to Mama.  Don't let go of my hand just yet.

Not yet.

Family of Four

Well, well, well... I am finally getting the chance to post some pictures! Hooray! When my sister-in-law was here with her kids back in February, she took hundreds of pictures. She always gets some great shots. She took some lovely pictures of our family. It took me a bit to go through and pick out a few favorites to share. Ezra looks so teeny-tiny back then. He's growing so fast. It really does go faster with the second! Now I just need to catch up on the pictures from the last, um, FIVE months or so! More to come...eventually.

Magical Moment of the Day

Sitting in my rocker, I gaze through a slit in the blinds, taking in the beautiful new morning, feeling a tiny squeeze on my finger as I cradle this sweet boy and listen to him gulp hungrily at my breast.

Let the Games Begin!

Remember that little burrito-boy I brought home from the hospital? I know I am way behind on pictures and I promise to post more soon, but let's just fast forward 5 and a half months and see what he's been up to. Rolling from front to back and back to front, scooting, grabbing, pulling, pushing....oh boy, diaper changes just got a whole lot more interesting. This guy is mobile!

(Click the arrow to see him in action)

Surprise, Surprise!

Well, if you didn't already know that my husband is the coolest, you will after you read what he did for me a while back. As some of you may have heard from me in the past, Xee is quite terrible at surprises. I mean, he loves to surprise me, but cannot contain himself and begins to drop hints the minute he has something in mind. He tells me he has a surprise for me and I always end up guessing it.

So when he said he had a huge one planned for my birthday/Mother's Day/Christmas planned, he did his best not to give it away. He said things like, "You can't take it back, Queen of Returns!" to try and throw me off. As usual, I plugged my ears, "La la la la..." I happen to like surprises and I don't ever want to ruin them.

Boy oh boy did this guy have a whopper for me! He threw me off by giving me a gift certificate for a day spa, along with a nice, little technical gadget. Then a few days later, the doorbell rang while I was "resting my eyes". With eyes half-open I shuffled to the door, expecting to tell the neighborhood kids that it wasn't a good time for Phoebe to play. Instead I saw my dear friend, Lara standing there before me, with Xee video taping behind her! A surprise indeed!

Though I was coming down with a cold, I had a lovely time with my friend for the few days she was able to visit. On her last day here, I was planning a bit of a scenic drive, when Xee called me and said he was getting off work early to join us. I was literally in the car with the kiddos buckled up, but I said, "Okay."

Half an hour later, there was a knock on the door. Lara answered it and told me my neighbor really needed to speak with me. I told her she's just have to wait as I was sitting on the couch, nursing the baby! Poor Lara tried to convince me to come to the door, but I wasn't going to budge. So in waltzes my SISTER and her entire family, one at a time. All I could do is shake my head, and say, "No...no...no."

My husband had been in cahoots with my mom and my sister for months in preparation for their trip. Truly the surprise of a lifetime. I hadn't seen my sister in well over a year and was desperately missing her. Now here she was, arms wrapped around me. A moment I will never forget. A treasure. I couldn't even express to Xee in words the love I felt from him and for him.

I am trying to play catch-up with the chronicle of this blog. I made my sister a Smilebox slideshow of her trip and I have posted it here. A shortcut for me. Enjoy the slides! (just click the arrow, Mom)

A free picture slideshow by Smilebox

To Us!

Ahem...I'd like to propose a toast

To Eleven Years of Marriage

To not-so-chance encounters

To that amazing first kiss

To a casual proposal in Old Navy

To dancing as Man and Wife

To our first home

To seven moves, to packing-tape, to many flights of stairs

To furniture assembly

To putting dining table legs on backwards!

To incredible fits of laughter

To pillow fights

To fancy dinners and fast food

To hot tea by the fire

To foot massages

To Country Music

To California, to Kauai, to Arizona, to Spain and London, to Maui, to Hawaii, to Oahu

To long road trips and books on tape

To midnight snacks and weekend movie marathons

To financial successes

To financial disasters

To joy and pain and sweat and tears

To passion

To the birth of our baby girl!

To dirty diapers, spit-up, and drool

To piggy-back rides and trips to the zoo

To bedtime stories

To little shoes at our doorstep

To the Verse O' the Day

To praise and worship, to spiritual growth!

To golf cart rides and sand between our toes

To Pilate's, to running, to swimming, to hiking, to yoga

To ice cream

To pushing a very prego me in a wheelchair through Home Depot

To the sweet smell of new babies

To our son!

To grey hairs and wrinkles and stretch marks

To growing older and a little bit wiser

To silliness

To singing out of tune

To innocence lost and regained

To mysteries yet uncovered

To dreams yet fulfilled

To holding on tight

To adventure

To friendship

To family

To Us!

The Glue

I opened up a screen to write a new post and I am just sitting here staring blankly at the screen. I am so fried. So totally fried. I often say that women are the "glue" in the family. We're the glue. And even when the glue gets sick, the glue keeps doing what she always does. Other people in the house take a nap. The glue keeps, well, being the glue. Wandering around the house in a fog, somehow managing to keep everything going. Now, I'm not saying I do it all. I just happened to be married to an awesome guy who grocery shops and does laundry and dishes too. But he is not the Mama, therefore he is not the glue.

This week has been a challenging one. I have so many little things I have wanted to chronicle here in our blog...visits from friends and family, pictures of the kids and reports of Ezra's progress. I write in my head all the time, but getting the words from my brain to the page seems like a bit of a long journey lately. I have my to-do lists. I would like to blog more, clean my house more thoroughly, possibly hang some pictures of our family on the walls. But in every day life, there are often many detours. This week is a prime example.

Phoebe went to Vacation Bible School a couple weeks ago and had an awesome time. We were so blessed to hear her learning new songs and scriptures, and just having a great time with the other kids at church. She came away gaining so much. The only thing we weren't so blessed by was the nasty virus that came home with her. Despite all my natural remedies and tinctures that would normally kick it out of her system within a day or two, she was really, really sick for over a week. We happened to have last-minute guests, some dear friends of mine from college, and poor Phoebe was just not herself. We all had an amazing time anyway.

Now, that wouldn't be so bad if Daddy hadn't gotten it too. Daddy and Phoebe seemed to be in the clear and on the mend when Mommy felt the symptoms. Then Daddy came home one morning from work and said, "My eye kind of hurts." I took one look at him and barked, "Conjunctivitis!" Pink Eye!!! We tried to quarantine Daddy, but it was too late. The very next morning little Ezra woke up with a very swollen, very pink, little eye...and a deep cough...and runny nose. And to top it all off, what I had summed up to be mere drool rash on his face, with closer examination, saw that it covered his entire body. A terrible case of Eczema out of the blue (which I believe is due to me allowing myself to reintroduce more chocolate into my diet...so SIGH, I will have to back off once more from this indulgence). Remember, this poor little dude is teething as well!

So the days have blurred together with doctor's visits and non-stop treatments. In between ushering out a slew of natural remedies to myself or others, we have been occupied with coaxing remedies into Ezra's mouth, rubbing creams on his body and ointment in his eyes, excessive (but necessary) hand-washing, sanitizing toys, teethers, sheets, etc, and me shouting, "Don't touch your brother!" In the meantime, Phoebe's appetite came back full-force, following the baby's growth spurt, has been going through one of her own. She is insatiable and I feel like I am FEEDING people at every moment of the day! Phew! Now everyone seems to be on the mend, though it is taking extra long for me, since the definition of "sleep" eludes me at the moment.

But this is not a list of complaints, as it may seem. I woke up feeling blessed. And thankful! So very thankful that these challenges are temporary. I cannot imagine what it is like for parents with terminally ill children, or impoverished children. Watching my kiddos suffer these past couple weeks has been terrible. I'm so thankful they are healthy. So thankful for all we've been blessed with.

I tell ya, it's not easy being the Wanted One. It can be so overwhelming when it seems that everyone needs something from me all at once. Xee and I have this little saying...well, it's my saying, but he agrees. You might hear me say sometime, "Even the fish is looking at me!" Have you ever walked past a fishbowl and watched their behavior? They always appear to be hungry, frantically swimming to and fro, looking to you to sprinkle more food at the top. Or so it seems. That really resonates with me as a mom.

At some point this week I told Phoebe she needed to go to be early because "sleep is the best medicine." She was quick to reply, "Mommies are the best medicine!" Music to my ears. My magical moment of the day, the week, the century! It is not easy being the glue. But I have to say that it can be so darn wonderful. There are so many blissful moments in the mayhem. Keeping my eyes open to see them is the important part. And really, I am not the glue. Jesus Christ is the glue in our home. I only pray that His love is at the heart of all I do, as I take center-stage in our home. I take a deep breath....and I pray. Then I get to work. There's laundry to do!

Hold Your Horses

Yeah, yeah. I know. I AM still here. Did I mention that Ezra is teething? And that he just went through a major growth spurt that has left me very sleep deprived for the last month or so? And since my laptop crashed months ago, I had been using Xee's, which is now on the fritz as well. So...Xee bought me (us) a new MacBook Pro and I can't wait for him to transfer our pictures to it. It will be so much faster getting you all recent pics of the kiddos.

Happy Independence Day! No fireworks for me...just sleep...I hope!

Happy Father's Day!

This free ecard personalized with Smilebox

Hello?

No, I did not fall off the face of the planet. So what's my excuse? Well, I did stub my toe badly when I misjsudged the bottom of the staircase other day. Ouch!

My mom emailed me yesterday, "I haven't seen any new posts lately." Translation: "Where are the pictures of my grandbabies?" (wink) I'm still here. And though late night blogging is still a love of mine, I have put it on the shelf and traded it for what very little alone time I may have with my husband before my new early bedtime routine. Mama's gotta sleep! Oh, and I have been baking a lot lately. Baking keeps me happy.

Okay, the pictures. I'll yet right on that.....YAAAAWWWN....sometime tomorrow. Good night.

Magical Moment of the Day

Sitting in a beach chair, watching Phoebe and her good friend, Grayson play in the sand while I talked "mom talk" with my dear friend, Melynne....while Daddy stayed home during Baby's morning nap!

Mysterious Aroma

While honeymooning on Kauai, Xee and I noticed that the air sometimes smelled like chili peppers. We figured it had to be a plant we were smelling. We asked around all week long, and none of the locals had an explanation for it. Some of them looked at us quite strangely. We smelled it! We knew we did.

We have been to Hawaii on several occasions prior to our move here and noticed a faint chili smell on those trips as well. And now that we live here, we might be driving down the road on our golf cart (yes, we have a golf cart) or going for a walk, when the aroma suddenly hits us...a fragrance reminiscent of our honeymoon, when our love affair with the islands first began.

The other day I was walking down the hall in our home and there it was...that smell. I walked into the bathroom and it got much stronger. Glancing around, my eyes fell upon the flowers I had placed in a little cup a few days before. One of my favorites, called Tiare. They are small, sweet-smelling white flowers, and it only takes a couple to freshen up an entire room.

Now these flowers were several days old and had withered. I brought my nose closer and took a big whiff....chili! Hmm...So my favorite sweet flower is actually sweet and spicy. Xee came home later and I brought him the dead flowers and said, "Hey honey, smell this." He looked at me like he always does when I say that. "No, seriously ...c'mon...smell it!"

"Chili!"

Exactly. Chili. Mystery solved. Ten years of wondering. Ten years! Now suddenly I had the answer. And you know, as exciting as it was to make the discovery, part of me is glad and the other is a wee bit sorry I found out. Somehow the not-knowing brings a sense of wonder to the unexplained. Oh well. The world is full of mystery. Time to go out and find a new one.

Picture Time

I have been working on this post for days now, off and on...a few minutes here and there in the midst of my daily life with Phoebe and the babe. Doing the "Baby Dance", hangin' with Miss Phoebe, and taking care of our home (sort of) is quite the juggling act. So here are some pictures...finally!

A view of the babe in my hospital bed. He was so teeny-tiny then...just weeks ago.

Home from the hospital at last.

Sweet time with Grammy!

Ah, time to relax!

Tiny toes!

"Kiss me!"

Sweet dreams.

Ezra's first doctors visit.

His first dinner at Roy's.

More dreams...

And more...

And yet more.

It might be nap time again...

"I kissed a giraffe."

"I love my sissy!"

Perspective

When I was a teenager, I saw little kids carrying a stuffed purple dinosaur around and I thought to my teenage self, "How lame!" Now I see my little girl singing and dancing to the tunes of his show and I see that giant, purple dinosaur in a whole different light. Funny how my perspective has changed.

Yesterday morning, I was reprimanding Phoebe, quite sternly, for lying....one of many interesting developments in her "almost-five" behavior recently. I guess I was coming down pretty hard on her because she started crying and said, "You are upsetting me!" Sometimes we forget how old Phoebe is because she acts much older (most of the time). We forget that she is still such a babe in many ways. I apologized for being harsh and I prayed silently, "Lord, please help me to see through the eyes of my child...give me her perspective."

Have you ever had someone over for dinner or a party and had them say something like, "Your house is always so neat...It always looks perfect." I don't know about you, but when someone says that to me, I laugh...HARD. Because I know that if they had looked inside my closet, they would have seen the pile of junk. If they had looked a little closer, they would have seen the loads of dirty laundry. They would have seen the cobwebs under beds and the dust bunnies in corners. If they had seen me scrambling just minutes before they arrived...they would have gained a little perspective.

Perfect? No way. My home does not look like a Pottery Barn catalogue, and neither does my life. There are piles of junk and cobwebs in my life. There are loads and loads of dirty laundry and almost always dishes in the sink. Sometimes my voice gets loud. Sometimes I quarrel with my husband. Sometimes my kid watches too much TV. But there is grace. Oh, there is grace. And there is mercy. There is forgiveness. And each day I pray, "Lord help me to be the wife and mommy you want me to be. Pick me up when I fall. Cover my mistakes with your love. Breathe your breath of life into the work of my hands. May I see what you see. Give me your perspective."

Sweet Talkin' Guy

My boy, Ezra, is quite the cooer. Coo? I am not sure where that term comes from, since nothing he says sounds like "coo". Anyway, I have tried many times to capture his sweet voice on camera, but most of the time he is so confused by the camera or phone that he simply stares. I was finally able to get a wee bit of footage of him chatting with me, though he is even more talkative without the distraction of digital devices in his face. He talks to everyone in the house, but has the most to say to his Mama. I am just thrilled with that-he is my little man!

(This video was taken with my phone and I ended up having to rotate it.)

Small Voice, Big God

"Mommy, I heard God speak to me a little."

"You did?...In your heart?"

"Mmhmm. He said, 'I love your baby brother sixty-hundred times infinity'. "

"Wow. That's so cool."

"Yeah."

"So...what did God's voice sound like?"

(thinks for a sec) "Kinda weird!"

I believe...do you?