Blissful Mommy Moments And One Not So Lonely Chair

For most of Phoebe's young little life, we have spent a portion of our day in our rocking chair (actually it's a glider, but we call it a rocker). When she first arrived, the glider, then strategically placed in the living room, was often my saving grace. Little ones change so quickly. The bedtime techniques that Xee and I have employed have shifted with her various stages.

When Phoebe stopped nursing and was sleeping through the night, the rocker was a place for winding down. I'd read her a couple books and sing to her while she soothed herself by sucking on her fingers...and loving on "booey". More often than not, she'd fall asleep in my arms. The days have gone by so quickly. I'm not sure when it happened, but our recent phase of winding down has shifted to Mommy and Daddy's bed. Phoebe loves to enjoy a book or two...or three, in our bed, snuggle up next to me and drift away before she's gently transferred to her own bed.

A few weeks ago I was walking past her room, and a lonely rocker caught my eye. I stood there and looked at it for a while, with a sweet longing in my heart. That night I nonchalantly asked her if she wanted to read in the rocking chair. She thought about it for about a second and said, "Nah...Can we read Curious George?"

Last night the little munchkin was having a bit of a hard time settling down for bed. She tossed and turned in our bed, kicking her legs, restless and wide awake. I didn't ask. I scooped up that great big baby girl and headed for the chair. With her head off to one side and her legs dangling way off to the other, we rocked as I hummed. Within a matter of seconds, my sweet girl was completely out!

Funny. Seconds earlier I had felt exhausted from the day. I couldn't wait to have a little personal space. Yet here I was glued to that chair. I sat there for the next half hour, just staring at her precious face. Watching her chest move up and down and running my hand over her silky hair. Pressing my face into hers, feeling her breath on skin...time stood still for just a minute.

Then a fluttering thought came and went, but a reality nonetheless. The inevitable. She's growing up. Though I can hardly imagine her ever being taller than me...one day she will be. One day she will rock a baby of her own in a chair much like this one. Of course I stuffed that thought into a deep, deep place in my mind and went downstairs to wash the dishes.

Tonight I tried to recreate the magic. Phoebe tossed and turned and declared, "I can't sleep Mommy!" Off to the rocker. After a few minutes of snuggle time, she said, "I'm sleepy now. Let's go back to your bed." Alright, I'll take what I can get. She's not going anywhere just yet. So for now, at least for now, I will rock her. I will sing. I will stare at her and smell her hair. And I will relish every moment!